Jokes

Stupid Laws

NEW YORK -

* It is against the law to throw a ball at someone's head for fun.
* The penalty for jumping off a building is death.

NEW JERSEY -

* You cannot pump your own gas. All gas stations are full service only.
* In Ocean City, it is against the law to slurp your soup at a restaurant.

NEW JERSEY -

* Et voi itse tankata autoasi. Kaikki huoltoasemat ovat palveluasemia.
* Ocean Cityssä on lain vastaista ryystää keittoa ravintolassa.

CALIFORNIA -

* It is illegal to set a mousetrap without a hunting license.
* Women may not drive in a house coat.

FLORIDA -

* It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
* Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.

OHIO -

* Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.
* It is illegal to get a fish drunk.

KANSAS -

* Pedestrians crossing the highways at night must wear tail lights.
* No one may catch fish with his bare hands.

OKLAHOMA -

* Violators can be arrested and/or jailed for making ugly faces at a dog.
* State law prohibits anyone taking a bite out of another's hamburger.

ALABAMA -

* It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.
* Boogers may not be flicked into the wind. Really.

WISCONSIN -

* In Racine, it is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.
* Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons.

VIRGINIA -

* It is illegal to sell peanut brittle on Sundays.
* Flipping a coin in a restaurant to see who pays for coffee is outlawed.

TEXAS -

* It is illegal have more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
* It is illegal for person to go barefoot without first obtaining a permit.

ILLINOIS -

* It is against the law to use a slingshot unless you are a police officer.
* Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.

IOWA -

* Public kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes.
* One-armed piano players must perform for free.

WASHINGTON -

* It is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag.
* People may not buy a mattress on Sunday.

MASSACHUSETTS -

* Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
* It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.

And finally:

ARIZONA -

* It is illegal to hunt camels within the state borders.
* In Tucson, women may not wear pants.

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Confirmation

Single women complain that all good men are married, while married women complain about their lousy husbands. This confirms that there is no such thing as a good man.

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On the sixth day God turned to the angel Gabriel and said, "Today I am going to create a land called Canada. It will be a land of outstanding natural beauty, it shall have tall majestic mountains full of mountain goats and eagles, beautifully sparkling lakes bountiful with carp and trout, forests full of elk and moose, high cliffs overlooking sandy beaches with an abundance of sea life, and rivers stocked with salmon."

God continued, "I shall make the land rich in oil so to make the inhabitants prosper, I shall call these inhabitants Canadians, they shall be known as the friendliest people on the Earth."

"But Lord," asked Gabriel, "don't you think you are being too generous to these Canadians?"

"Not really," replied God, "just wait and see the neighbors I am going to give them!"

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Päivitetty 19.10.2018 18:49
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